Australian Dream

Back to the other side of the world.

I have stopped writing for a few months having received a big blow on my head after my last posting.
Jesse wrote a mail begging me not to answer the girl who was going to get in touch with me.
according to him she was his ex who had got his details and he was going to warn all his contacts in an emergency. The latter, "a sneaker", was going to tell me lies and may even say she is his wife, and I was supposed not to tell anything to her concerning him and his family.
As I had started to have doubts about is being moved into another department and not having access to his private emails anymore, and as his scare mails sounded less expressing his love for me as he used to do, I replied to the girl to find out in stupefaction that she was a 24 something living in Canada.
I did the mistake , but was it one ?, to add Jesse into my contacts on March 28th and that girl found out about me.
She was not, of course, the mother of his kids, just a girl he met in Q&A in November answering her question about broken hearts.
He started to declare his love to her, and she found out about another woman he was chatting with in December of last year.
I don't really know what he was telling that other one, but apparently it made that Canadian girl mad, for she broke the relationship with Jesse as soon as she had gotten in touch with her.
It is precisely by that time that I met Jesse. I found out that as he was telling me about his love, and how he would do all he could to have us living together, he was doing all his best to win that girl back.
I had been cheated on all along.
But the worse thing is that he said almost the same thing to her: I was a liar and she had better keep away from me.
He had introduced himself to her as a single man with no children.
Kathy, yes, that's her name, kept asking me if Jesse had children and was not believing me.
He told her he was making fun with me, and fancied his having kids because I was a mother. Lame excuse ?
He told her I was just a friend he was chatting with, but nothing like a lover.
I had to do something I hated to do: forward her all the mails he had sent me, telling about Lisa and Jesse Jr and about his readiness, willingness and ability to live with me. I cried a lot rereading all his love words, just to find out he was telling the same ones to Kathy in the mean time. The latter even called them "Jesse"s quotes". Lol !
He said he had never cheated upon her, for I was a mere friend for him, and if he told me such words, it was because he pitied me not having an active sexual life. He wanted to make me happy this way.
Kathy has started IMing me everyday since that day of March.
We have been perusing his answers and questions since, and also his past ones previous to our meeting with him.
I let her know how I found out he introduced himself as a happily married man with children, confused because attracted to another woman. He gave me something that sounded like a lame excuse. He wanted to gain more points by saying it. He gave Kathy the same excuse once. Winning points !!!
Of course, he got mad at me for having answered Kathy and said very nasty things to me, how I could have been stupid at my age to believe what a stranger was telling me on the web.
I replied that he had been stupid to believe that I would leave my husband and my high standard of living for a mere worker in LA.
I spent a fortnight fighting with him through emails and chatting with Kathy on Messenger.
Kathy doesn't want Jesse to know I am in touch with her. He keeps warning her to stay away from me and he said she didn't like me either.
I stopped playing that loser/winner game after I replied to his saying I would never meet another one like him. God preserve me from it ! was my reply. Preserve me from meeting again such a liar and a cheater !
I called him winner with much irony.
I discovered what being a Sureno means. I read all about these gangs and what one has to perform to become a member. I also found out the meaning of the spider tattooed on his forearm. Prison time.
Kathy knows all this and is not scared by such a past studying psychology and working in a delinquent home. It is as if she wanted to save that lost soul.
The only thing that seems to bother her is the fact that he may have children.
He sent her a photo of himself and he is overweight, due to his diabetes, I guess. Well, she got a new one lately and he has lost weight.
She herself is suffering from juvenile arthritis and a lupus. Her bad state of health led to hospital a few weeks ago.
She is of Chilean origin and they both share an Hispanic background they are very proud of.
Anyway she has been spending days asking me for advice. Should she give him a second chance ? He calls her, emails her everyday, begs her to come back and even to come to LA and marry him.
What can I say to that ?
I can easily admit I was a fool cheated on for months. It hurts a lot, but if it is the actual thing, I can't stay blind any longer.
Kathy seems to think she is the only one he is not lieing to. Anyway she had to admit she got a blow on her head when he finally acknowledged to her that I was more than a friend. So she didn't even believed what she was reading ! Lol !
She finally told me Jesse has two accounts on Q&A. He met her on the other one. It can expalin why he was not visiting his Q&A during the week-ends. He was on the other account from which he was emailing Kathy unknowingly from me.
He has not used that one for four months, but has recently added a new friend, a Miss V... , into his contacts.
He is adding girls into his contacts by now, something he had never done previously. The last added is Kathy who then thinks it is a proof of his love for her, not keeping her into the hiding anymore. That one is a complete fool !
Jesse now wants to meet her family in Canada previous to a wedding. Her mother and older sister don't mind his past too much, and agree to give him a second chance.
In my opinion, it is not only a second chance, but a third as she already gave him a second chance after they broke in December, following her discovery of another woman.
I also put the stress on the quality of his answers, mostly about sex, oral and anal.
She is a virgin but that doesn't shock her.
Lately he answered a girl who wanted to know what boys would like her to wear. He said "butt naked and waiting for me". I would not like my man answering that to a girl even in a virtual world, but that she doen't mind. In fact, that's precisely what he keeps telling her. What does she know about sodomy ? She avowed me that he begs her for photos of her breasts and naked butt. That man is mentally sick ! A real pervert ! But the virgin doesn't mind. She finds it natural that he desires her that way, a proof of his love.
She wanted to know if he ever asked me for such pictures. I told her that if he tried and spoke sex to me I had him stop and how romantic his speeches were afterwards.
But I kept silent concerning him for weeks. I still checked into his Q&A to get to know him better, and also to have matter to discuss with Kathy.
He sent an SOS to the Yahoo people saying a fifty plus was after him even having blocked all emails from her. Two girls replied being rude towards me and I had to contact them to explain the situation and who that Sureno is actually. They both apologized and we are still in contact.
I didn't write to him though.
Finally he answered one of his new contacts' questions, talking of a fool, playing with two girls, taking them as booty calls, and that not wanting to hurt one he advised th eother to forward the latter all the mails she has got from that fool and thus catch him into his act. Lol ! That's too much !
I couldn't help jump on one of that Chiquita's questions to make allusions that in fact Sureno was talking of himself on mentioning that fool. No reaction on either sides.
I asked a question on avatars as he replied to Kathy's question on goatee and beard. I added I prefered a clean-shaven one for in this expression there is the word "clean". Adding comments to my question, I said avatars are a best way to hide reality from others and even having children.
Jesse read all this, and advised Kathy to tell me not to answer any of her questions anymore.
But the latter begged me to answer one about being loved or not. I reluctantly replied.
She then asked questions about loving a man and he replied he loved one dearly too. She was in heaven !
But I made her notice he answered a question about being with an older women, 16 yeras older, and he said he didn't mind if he fell for her. She eluded that one. He asked another one about girls in bikini. He used to say i should be a knock out in my bikini as I was telling him of my wearing one on so many days.
I am sure he has still got me on his mind, and didn't reply to Kathy's last questions especially willing to know about giving up all in life for the sake of her lover. Weird !
She has made up her mind on going back to him by now. I wish her good luck !
I have wasted too much time with these two.
I told Jesse in my last mail that I had already moved on and had found a new friend in New Zealand, a nice man, not in the hiding, sending me pictures of is family. Brian is really nice indeed. I enjoy our chatting together. He is 60, recently divorced, and a loving father.
So I am back to the other side of the world.
But all this sad story has ruined my relationship with Marty.
He was obviously jealous hearing of Jesse, and played songs dealing with California, and went as far as welcoming the people in California, especially a girl there, who were wakening up as he was leaving Bo's.
I quickly stopped speaking of jesse, ashamed of myself.
Then I told him of my new friend in New Zealand. Marty has been ignoring me since. I keep on doing as if I were not aware of it. I feel hurt though, and I am wondering if he is still with Clare. On my last phone call, month ago he said they should meet when she is finished with her exams.
He has been away twice for long week-ends lately, but I am not too sure it was for him to meet her. I should phone him, but not yet though.
He seems to be back to better feelings concerning me, playing Bob Sinclar again, Sean Paul and even Paris Avenue "From Paris to Berlin". Of course, he didn't say it was for me, but he spoke of a French lady and of French people, something he had not done for weeks.
I understood something yesterday. Dan played a song by Evermore. I requested it quite often at the end of the parties after having told Marty about Brian. I was not aware this groups was from New Zealand, till Marty added once that Mary decidedly loved these guys from New Zealand.
I asked Brian who confirmed me these boys are from a village south of Auckland.
Marty can have such weird reactions at my telling him about other boys. That may be the reason of his actual behavior. That may be not.
I am back to the other side of the world but not happy by Marty's attitude. I have got to win him back by any means. It will take me a lot of patience that I know. It has not been the first time he has acted that way and has always come back to me. But, lol, not as long as by now.
This side of the world is safer though !