A life of disappointments.

I think my Australian dream has come to its end.
My husband has been diagnosed with prostate cancer and will have an operation next September. The trip we were to make to Canada and the States has been canceled and I guess another trip to Australia will never be made possible. He said he was not feeling too good during our last stay and would not be able to do another long distance trip again. Unfortunately he seemed to be too right saying it.
Marty is in Geraldton by now and I finally found out on which radio he is working at present. But again his morning show is not on the web. One positive thing was to find him on FaceBook among the friends I was supposed to know. Alas he denied my invitation to join me on my page. Dan did sponteanously. But I can still be with him when I connect to Bo's. He is very present there doing more nights now.
I can't refrain from sending Marty e-mails from time to time giving him sports updates as I used to do. It was hard to watch the French Open in tennis this year not being able to share my comments with him. Same with the Tour which has just ended. He is such a fan of these two events !
I have downloaded all the favorite songs he used to play when a DJ at Bo's. I seldom listen to them by now when tuned to this site. I don't know if it is a good thing ...
My girl is here for a few weeks, but she is not in the mood of spending the whole of her holidays with us and is speaking of leaving after the 15th of August. I need her company so much especially as I am so concerned with my husband's health. But she says she has to live her own life. It is so selfish on her part as she lives most of the year far from home and she went to so many places last: Madeira Island, London, Normandy, etc ... I thought she could take four weeks in our company without feeling she was sacrifying too much for us.
What is the use of being kind to everyone if it brings you disappointments all the time.
It is hard for me to cope with all here being lonesome: no friends nor relatives to give me a hand.
Living with someone who is losing his mind, not being to be able to handle a mobile phone, nor a remote control, and who has no logic into his conversation is not easy. Marty knew all this of course, and strange enough it did me good to know he was with me for a few hours. I can't hide it, I miss him so much. I must face the truth: he has not taken me into his luggage on leaving for Geraldton.
The friends I had in Australia dropped me too these last months. Both girls were so nice for some time and I could have people to talk to and express my feelings. Gone with the wind !
Summertime and the beach to enjoy. I do have to shake myself up in some way or other. But my heart is broken for sure.